Tapas is brilliant.

Can’t decide if you want beef or fish? Or pork or meatballs? Not a problem, you can have it all.

The only tricky bit when it comes to ordering in a tapas restaurant is working out how much food you actually need.

Most of us get lots of different bits and share, but this can be tricky if people have specific dietary requirements.

Two friends found themselves in this situation while eating out, as one of them is a vegan.

Yummy

They decided to share a few dishes, including patatas bravas and a salad, but each ordered their own main options.

However when the vegan started telling the waitress her order, she was shocked by her response.

Writing on Mumsnet , she said: “Yesterday I went out with a friend for tapas. I’m vegan, my friend isn’t.

“My friend ordered several plates of fish/meat (some deep fried), a salad and patatas bravas for us to share.

“I started to order, asking for a pepper and aubergine stew, a spinach dish, some bread for my friend and I to share and a salad.

“At that point the waitress raises her eyebrow and says ‘two salads?’

They knew exactly what they wanted to order (stock image)

“I explained that I can’t eat the one my friend has chosen due to the egg in the dressing and then ask for a portion of fried aubergines.

“As I ask for the aubergines, the waitress gives me horrified look and makes a big show of counting down the list of dishes we’ve ordered.

“She then emphatically says ‘enough!’ as she gets to the end of the order, while giving me the most disgusted look.

“I explain that I’m vegan, so cannot eat any of what my friend ordered and therefore need to order for myself. The waitress, tries to argue with me about how many dishes I need and I point out that my friend ordered one more item than me and she didn’t comment then.

“Plus, the vegetable dishes at the restaurant in question aren’t particularly large portions.

“The waitress stomps off in a huff. Later, I hear her taking a massive order from the table behind me without comment.

“My friend is very thin and the couple on the table behind me were also rather skinny. I’m size 16/18 depending where I shop and 5′ 10” tall, so not small by any means.

“I suspect I was publicly fat shamed. What do you reckon?”

Waitress
She was really upset by the comment (stock image)

However many other parents don’t believe the waitress was in the wrong, and suggested she was probably just trying to help.

One wrote: “I think it’s common for tapas staff to give you the nod that you’ve over ordered. Are you sure you weren’t projecting your own insecurities?

“And when she commented, it depends on the way you explained about being a vegan…if you were abrupt maybe that pissed her off? Or maybe her shoes were pinching. Anyway I highly doubt she was fat shaming.”

Another added: “I don’t think she was fat shaming I think she was rudely expressing concern at food waste and assuming you had no idea how much food you were actually ordering.

“It sounds like your friend ordered at least five plates and you another four. I’m quite versed in tapas and a big eater and three plates per person is pretty generous. If they are small portions then I can understand why but it sounds like a huge amount of food anyway.

“I think she assumed your friend was ordering for the both of you but she has a shut customer service manner either way.”

One user wrote: “Every time I have been to a tapas restaurant the waiter has done the “that’s enough!” thing. It sounds like as you got a bit defensive she then reacted to that.

“Your friend ordered quite a lot, but usually with tapas you order together. So the vegan stuff and the meat stuff ordered all at once, then you just eat the vegan.”

But other people aren’t so sure.

One commented: “It sounded like initially she was trying to say you may have ordered more than was necessary, but when you explained you were a vegan that should have been the end of it. I think she was very rude to comment and you’re not the unreasonable one. It’s none of her business.”

Another added: “Thin privilege. If you’re thin you won’t be judged no matter how much you eat.”



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Zoe Forsey

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